


In The End, It's You

by coffeeblossoms02



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, i still don't know what to tag help
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-06
Updated: 2019-04-06
Packaged: 2020-01-05 13:55:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18367385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeeblossoms02/pseuds/coffeeblossoms02
Summary: Taeyong laughs heartily; resting his forehead on Dongyoung’s and closes his eyes, relishing in the love Dongyoung showers him with. “What do I do without you, Dongyoung?”“You’re still gonna be you, Taeyong. The kindest, purest, the most beautiful soul I’ve ever known.”Or; Taeyong can't sleep so he goes to his favorite pillow.





	In The End, It's You

**Author's Note:**

> thought i'd never dotae again but jokes on me, this piece kinda breathed itself to existence so here we are lol. i'd consider this crap soft but you can't expect anything pain-free from coffeeblossoms. anyway, as always, enjoy!

Taeyong feels restless. He’s been jumpy all day, alternating between playing games and practicing girl group dance to distract his mind from going haywire, to no avail. Needless to say, he’s exhausted, as a result.

But his eyes won’t compromise and keep opening on their own when he tries to lay down, his whirring thoughts chasing sleep away from him, right when they get one day break from practice in between concert preparation.

Resigning to his fate, he stands up abruptly, startling Youngho who’s in the middle of editing video on the bed next to his.

Youngho pulls off one of his air pods, staring in concern at Taeyong who’s biting his nails, shuffling on his feet like he’s losing his mind, “You need something, Yongie?”

Taeyong frowns to the question. Does he need something? He does, maybe. But what does he need? His eyes roam around frantically while he looks for an answer he knows he wouldn’t get in that four walls.

He missed Youngho’s soft, understanding expression as he watches Taeyong’s face twisting in confusion, accompanied by a cute pout Taeyong doesn’t realize it’s there.

“You know what,” Taeyong says after another heartbeat, giving up on explaining, scratching his not-itching cheek, tipping his head to the door, “I’m gonna go get some fresh air.”

Youngho only raises his brows when Taeyong scrambles out of their shared room.

He loves Youngho, but Youngho’s positivity shines too bright it’s blinding at times. And right now Taeyong needs his lights low, where it isn’t too harsh for his eyes to make him see the reality he lives in clearer, when the world feels too much, he could indulge in a tad bit dimmer light. So he let his feet leads him back to the one place he could go.

He passes his members—his family chatting so lively in the living room, discussing animatedly in small circles. No one can afford to rest when the high of _their own concert_ hasn’t worn off. He can feel their excitement thrumming in the air, so full it’s dripping hot, burning energy in their wake, but Taeyong only gets nauseated.

He offers his best smile when they notice him and ask him to join them, politely refusing. He doesn’t know what they see in his face other than what he hopes isn’t a grimace, but they don’t push, and go back to what they left off. He sighs involuntarily and continues with his steps.

It doesn’t take long for him to reach a door he knows all too well, and already he feels more at ease. He knocks softly and pushes the door open when a quiet invite answers him. A wave of relief washes over him and he doesn’t know he was nervous for heavens know what reason.

What greets him inside isn’t anything out of the ordinary, but Taeyong really missed the familiarity in it. Dongyoung sat with his back on the bed’s headboard, a book sprawled open on his lap. Taeyong smiles at the sight.

Dongyoung looks so comfortable in his element, drowning in loose cotton shirt, engulfed by the quiet atmosphere, with lo-fi music playing softly in the background; soft lightning from the artificial light dances with the golden rays filtered through the blinds on his smooth, pale skin, making him looks so much more like a daydream.

Dongyoung looks up from his book, glasses sliding down a bit on his nose. His face breaks into soft smile when his gaze falls on Taeyong. He spreads his arms, a silent welcome for Taeyong.

Taeyong throws himself wordlessly in those scrawny yet veiny limbs, sighing contentedly when Dongyoung wraps his arms around him, securing Taeyong in his glass-like frame.

Taeyong closes his eyes, curling up on the broad chest, burying himself deeper in Dongyoung’s lulling hums vibrating on his chest, Dongyoung’s calm, steady heartbeat, and Dongyoung’s warmth encaging him.

He barely registers Dongyoung kissing the top of his head and nuzzles his cheek on Taeyong’s hair as he falls into slumber with ease he couldn’t get in his own room.

He’s still pressed on Dongyoung’s chest when he opens his eyes, but Dongyoung had lowered them to lie comfortably on the bed, and threw the cover on them at some point.

He cranes his neck and finds Dongyoung isn’t sleeping and he’s taken off his glasses, staring at him with bare, glimmering eyes. There’s the fond look reserved only for him that Taeyong wanted to see the most in those obsidian eyes. Taeyong rubs his own bleary ones, croaking in small voice, “Hi.”

“Hello,” Dongyoung laughs quietly, sweeping Taeyong’s hair from his face and kisses his forehead, “Sleep well?”

Taeyong nods, humming then lies back. Dongyoung’s hand finds its way on Taeyong’s back, rubbing pattern in soothing manner. Taeyong feels his eyes heavy again.

“Don’t sleep.” Dongyoung says, as if he could read Taeyong’s mind. “It’s about dinner time. Youngho hyung ordered sushi. He said something about Yoonoh craving for some sashimi.” He squint his eyes as his free hand scrolling through their group chat. When Taeyong doesn’t budge, he sighs, putting his smart phone on the bedside table and rubs Taeyong’s back again, “Yongie…”

“But it’s too comfortable!” Taeyong whines, burying his face on Dongyoung’s neck, trapping Dongyoung with his arm and leg under the cover. “Can we skip dinner? Don’t wanna leave bed.”

“Nope. We’re leaving this bed and you’re going to eat. Who knows if you don’t skip meals today?”

“I ate decent amount today!”

“Sorry but I don’t trust your ‘decent amount of food’ when it comes to your own meal.”

Taeyong can practically hear the pointed look in Dongyoung’s voice. He looks up, and Dongyoung looks about ready to give Taeyong a piece of his mind. So he pouts, and doubles the attack with puppy eyes and cute voice, “But Taeyongie is still sleepy!”

Dongyoung rolls his eyes, huffing, but Taeyong knows he’s wavering, for the corners of Dongyoung’s lips quirking. “Fine. Five minutes.”

Taeyong squeals and kisses Dongyoung’s cheek, then settles back on his favorite pillow (Dongyoung’s chest), legitimately missing faint blush creeping on Dongyoung’s cheeks. “Dongyoungie is the best!”

“If Taeyongie doesn’t wake up in five minutes, he’s having seconds.”

“Okay, Mom.” Taeyong huffs, his voice muffled by Dongyoung’s shirt. Dongyoung let out airy laugh, tightening his hold on Taeyong. He shuts his eyes and slips into the dreamland for the second time easily.

He ends up sleeping longer than five minutes, waking up when the others have done eating, and Dongyoung manages to make him eat a lot more than his daily portion, but Taeyong can’t find it to be mad at Dongyoung for looking out for him. He was the one coming to Dongyoung looking for comfort after all. And he wouldn’t deny he missed the way Dongyoung doting on him.

After making sure everyone has washed up for bed and promises him nobody is going to stay up late so they won’t be too tired for practice tomorrow (which almost half of them roll their eyes to), Dongyoung pulls Taeyong by the wrist to his room, somehow Minhyung has migrated to Youngho and Taeyong’s room with his blanket to give them some space.

Soon Taeyong finds himself wrapped under the cover with Dongyoung spooning him again. A part of him always knows Dongyoung can put his pieces back together again; Dongyoung has always especially understanding towards him. And now that Taeyong feels himself spiraling, he’d hold onto it, to Dongyoung, to keep his head above the water, as selfish as it may seem.

“Dongyoungie?”

Dongyoung hums.

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

Taeyong hoist himself up by the elbow, enough to stare down on Dongyoung’s eyes. He leans in and kisses Dongyoung’s cheek, then hurriedly hides his face on Dongyoung’s neck. Feeling Dongyoung’s breathe hitched under him; he takes in some pride for kissing him.

“Yongie…”

He can feel Dongyoung’s heartbeat picked up underneath the fabric, mirroring his own.

“You don’t have to thank me… like that.”

Taeyong’s heart skipped a beat, his mind’s buzzing already, and his fingers clutches on Dongyoung’s shirt unconsciously. “I’m sorry…”

“No no no,” Dongyoung pulls away a bit and tilts Taeyong’s chin gently so they can look at each other in the eyes, “Don’t apologize. I mean, you know I’d take care of you gladly, any time you need it. I’m always here for you. No need to thank me.”

Before he can stop his mouth, Taeyong asks, “Why?”

“Because I care about you, Taeyong. Because I love you.”

Taeyong’s eyes widen, “What?”

Dongyoung laughs, “I thought it was obvious? Even the kids noticed.”

Taeyong is dumbfounded, stuttering, “But- I mean- why?”

Dongyoung frowns, “What do you mean ‘why’?” Before Taeyong can respond, Dongyoung cups his cheeks with his both hands, “I don’t know what’s on your mind, Taeyong. But you deserve all the love in the world. Whatever it is that’s weighing you down, you can share it with me. I can’t promise I can help with everything, but you don’t have to face it all alone. You have me, Taeyongie.” He leaves a lingering kiss on Taeyong’s forehead, and Taeyong’s eyes fall shut, reeling from the sudden confession, and the warmth washing over from where Dongyoung’s touch tingling on his skin.

Dongyoung pulls back, but not too far Taeyong can still feel his breathe on his face. But Taeyong doesn’t dare opening his eyes, afraid that it was only his dream. That if he opens his eyes, he’s not on Dongyoung’s bed and everything Dongyoung said was only a fragment of his imagination, of his tired, polluted mind trying to find a way to cope up with reality.

But Dongyoung’s body heat under him, the warmth seeping through his skin, rising up to his chest from where Dongyoung is still holding him feels so real. Holding on to the feeling of dainty fingers pressing on his face, Taeyong gulps and opens his eyes slowly. He almost cries when he did.

Dongyoung’s eyes, _Taeyong’s favorite_ pair of obsidian pools, are gleaming from the light above them, holding the softest, fondest look, the look that’s always been there, but he never dared to try and decipher what’s the meaning of it before, afraid it was just his mind playing tricks on him, that he doesn’t mean anything more than a brother for Dongyoung.

“Dongyoung I-“

“You don’t have to say anything.” Dongyoung cuts. “I understand if you can’t accept this kind of feeling right now. I should’ve find a better time to say it,” he laughs nervously. “You should love yourself first, Taeyong. Find your happiness, not only acceptance in this God forsaken world.” He smiles, caressing Taeyong’s cheek with the pad of his thumb. “I’ll walk with you along the way.”

Taeyong’s words caught up in his throat, Dongyoung’s gentleness overwhelms him it surges up and welling in his eyes. “You promise? Promise you’ll wait for me?”

“No, I said I’ll walk with you. I’ll be by your side, Taeyong. That’s different.”

Taeyong smacks his arm weakly; laughing as his tears springs free. “You know what I mean.”

Dongyoung’s smile widens and reaches Taeyong’s hands, bringing them up to his face and kisses them. “Thank you for coming to me today.”

Taeyong snorts despite the blush creeping on his face, “You didn’t accept my gratitude yet you _thank me_ for sleeping on you?”

Dongyoung pinches Taeyong’s cheek lightly then wipes his tears, “You can sleep better and I get to hold my crush in my arms, I think it’s a win for the both of us.”

Taeyong swats Dongyoung’s hand away, feeling his face heating up more.

Dongyoung laughs, pinching and squishing both of Taeyong’s cheeks, “Aigooo, Taeyongie is so cute!”

Taeyong whines, “Stop!”

Dongyoung’s fingers loosen but don’t leave Taeyong’s face, cradling it gently, and he kisses Taeyong’s nose. “Smile more, Taeyongie. I like all your looks, but happiness looks best on you.”

“Yeah, just send me the link where I can buy it, will ya?” Taeyong huffs while trying to hide his now scarlet face with his hand but Dongyoung stops him, clasping their hands together and holds them on his chest.

“I don’t know much about happiness either to be honest. But if you ever need me again, just hold my hand.”

Taeyong laughs heartily; resting his forehead on Dongyoung’s and closes his eyes, relishing in the love Dongyoung showers him with. “What do I do without you, Dongyoung?”

“You’re still gonna be you, Taeyong. The kindest, purest, the most beautiful soul I’ve ever known.”

Taeyong opens his eyes, Dongyoung is smiling at him.

“But I am here with you now. I always am. You have me and the others too here with you. You don’t have to face this world alone, Taeyong.”

Taeyong buries his face on Dongyoung’s shoulder, feeling his heart about to burst in his chest, “For now… can we just sleep?”

Dongyoung chuckles, rubbing Taeyong’s small back as he lower them down, Taeyong lying on top of him. “Sorry I’m keeping you up, Yongie.”

Taeyong shakes his head, muttering, “Don’t be sorry, I’m glad you did.” Dongyoung doesn’t answer and the room goes silent, Taeyong tries to sleep to Dongyoung’s rhythmic heartbeat, basking in the comfortable darkness, the warmth engulfing him, but of course there’s a bug in his mind that won’t leave him alone. When he thinks Dongyoung has fallen asleep due to his steady breathing, he adds quietly, “I needed to hear it. Thank you Dongyoung.”

But Dongyong’s arms caging around him tightens. “I’ll say it until you believe it, Taeyong. Now sleep, please.”

Taeyong hums lowly, closing his eyes, letting himself drowning in the tranquil, safe air wrapped in Dongyoung’s arms. It feels like it’s been so long since he’s felt so serene. Without him knowing, a small smile grazing on his lips, a little hope sparks in his heart, and he’d like to think it’s brought by Dongyoung’s presence pressed so close to him.

He still has to wake up and go on with his life tomorrow, waking up to see a new day terrifies him sometimes, as ungrateful as it may comes off, since he’s living the life some people can only dream of. But he’s only a person with his own soul inside his physical form, he gets tired and lost at times, questioning his existence just like everyone else. But he has Dongyoung by his side, like he always has.

He doesn’t know if it’s ever going to happen, but when he can finally say he’s happy with his life, with himself, and it’s not a lie, he knows Dongyoung is going to be there with him.

 


End file.
